Left to My Own Devices

Remember how I wanted time off? Well I take it back, I'm bored now. Will sent me home early because of all my whining and now I have nothing to do. Of course I spent the afternoon doing my hair and getting back to looking like my usual sultry self, but after all that I got bored. I'm blaming this on Will and the amount of work he still has to do. I want to have some fun but he's always busy.

Well at least I have my new hobby to keep me occupied. Sebby texting. I just happened to get my hands on darling Sebastian's mobile phone number. You would think someone as perfect as Sebby would have a better phone, every time I call him I get cut off and he never seems to get any of my messages. Maybe the brat should give him a raise and then he will be able to buy a phone that actually answers my calls.

While I was having a bit of a sing-a-long earlier (because I have nothing better to do when Will isn't home but to turn up some music and have a bit of a nice loud sing) I was thinking about how strange it would be to live in a musical. Oh if only life were that dramatic. I got a little confused though, would Life be just one big giant musical? Or would there be millions of musicals with everyone starring in the musical of their own individual lives?

But either way, if life was a fantastic, Westend production of course yours truly would steal the show~

High Heels 101

Since I got some enquires about my fabulous footwear I thought I would part with more of my wonderful womanly wisdom and teach all of you how to walk in heels.
I am a bit of an expert on the subject so here is some tips from your auntie Grell~

• Start Small: Starting with high spike heels wont do you or your feet any favours, so start with a few inches and work your way up.
  
• Work You Hips: Walking in heels is automatically gives you a sexy strut, if you fight it your balance will get messed up. So go with it~!
  
• Practice Makes Perfect: Adjust to your shoes before taking them somewhere were there will be a lot of walking. Short trips around the house or to nearby shops will get you accustomed to your new babies before you're ready for a full length performance.
  
• Socks: Synthetic materials will rub and burn when you're wearing high heels so cotton socks are your friend as they cause less friction.
  
• Don't Wear Them All The Time: Even I have to wear flats sometimes and wearing heels all the time can cause health problems for you mortals. Also carrying a small pair of flat trainers or pumps in your handbag when your out can save you from beautiful, yet torturous shoes when you cant go home and change.
  

How to walk on ice in high heels?
The simple answer to this question is...don't, unless you're me. But since so many people have messaged me to ask me this question I'll tell you.

• Wear a heel which isn't too thin as you will be able to balance better.
  
• Wear shoes that have good grip.
• Practice.
  
• BE CAREFUL! You're not me, you can fall over and break your neck. Next winter if I have to reap any high heel, ice related accidental deaths I will bring you back just so I can kill you again myself for being stupid.
  

If I stated the obvious a little I apologise but some of my Grellettes asked so I delivered.

Oh and I got a few last minute messages from Ronnie this afternoon. Apparently me and William are hosting a party tomorrow night that we didn't know about. Well this should be interesting...

How to Get Your Man ~

I apologise for my lack of blogs lately. Everything has been so dull around here lately that I can hardly think of anything to write about. Luckily for me I got a message asking me to share my extensive knowledge of men. Of course I am more than happy to instruct you all on how to find your red strings, your soul mates, so here are a few of my fabulous man hunting tips.

Remember you are irresistible

Always believe that you are beautiful and that any man would DIE to have you, and any man who says he doesn't like you just doesn't know that he loves you yet.

Never send mixed signals
If you like someone tell them, often. Men can be silly, they will never work out that you like them if you don't tell them yourself.

Men like attention
Complements, pet names, kisses and other attentive actions show men that you care. Even if they are not your boyfriend...yet

Learn everything about your love target
I've been told this is called "stalking" but how else are you supposed to learn about the man you love? Some people just don't understand true love~!

All is fair in love and war
Of course if a man is devilishly handsome then you will probably find more than one suitor after his attention. Arranging a few little "accidents" for these people will clear all obstacles out of the path of your true love.

Those are just a few of my tips to get yourself the man of your dreams. The pursuit of love it all about finding your red string, your happily ever after. I just hope I helped just a little

A Good Relationship is Like a Good Handbag

I'm writing this before Ronald comes back because he will distract me like he did last time with the post-its.

I was thinking and I realised that I have given William a bit of a hard time on my blog and made him sound like a bit of a bully. A few people have Tweeted to me about the abuse I receive from my sexy supervisor. I just want to clear something up...I like it. Yes Will disciplines me when I do something stupid but he really isn't that bad. He apologises if he hits me too hard or makes me cry and even buys me pressies when he has been exceptionally horrible. William is a secret softy and can be really attentive and sweet when no one else is around. He is my Valentine this year so STOP GIVING HIM A HARD TIME! And no more sending him nasty messages!

Now that that is all cleared up...

Will did take me out for dinner after work today. I told you he would, and it has nothing to do with we bothering him about it all day today.

And like I predicted everyone has tried on Eric's new glasses. They're OK, nearly the exact same as his old ones though just a slightly different shape. I might steal them again later when I'm bored.

Reasons Why a Good Relationship is Like Your Favourite Handbag

1) It happily takes anything, no matter how awkward it is.

2) Other bags may look good but they will never live up to your favourite.

3) You will repair it over and over again until it cant possibly take any more and then it will be near impossible to find another bag like it.

Well...that made sense in my head.

I think I should end this before I start thinking of more girly wisdom.

Love you all~

Grell
xx

Why am I listening to Liberty Party on repeat?!?!